They called her strong,
For she smiled through the tears.
They called her weak,
For she smiled, but she cried.
They said she was brave,
For she smiled when catastrophe struck.
They said she was a coward,
For she only smiled when catastrophe struck.
They said she was happy,
For she smiled all the time.
They said she was sad deep inside,
And her smiles were only a cover- up.
Confused, I asked her how she felt,
Why she smiled, and that too at everything.
Her reply baffled me, and still echoes my heart-
“ I smile because its beautiful, in the hope that it will touch hearts. And this is how I play life- fooling it at its own GAME, TACTIC, AND ART.”
The topic I decided to write on today is a rather complex one, and yet it is the simplest of the subjects most people claim to be experts on. So I will not be judging whether they’re good judges, or whether they can’t judge on even the most basic of the criteria, and what I will present here, is my own view on this!
LOVE. Luckily, I opened my eyes in this world to be greeted with this superb emotion called LOVE. Surprisingly though, beginning with not knowing what it meant, even today, a good more than twenty years from that day, I haven’t been able to settle on one definition of this word.
As a child, I was sure this word meant something very comfortable, something very nice, and something I could take for granted in my happy world. Growing up, teacher gave it several meanings, even tried to define it, and this is when friends taught me meanings they alone thought were right. It meant everything from a feeling of mushiness, to affection, to attachment, to something that brought joy, and also something movies seemed to give a lot of importance to. My dictionary today lists 28 meanings of this word! Oh God, who wouldn’t get confused?! Most movies seemed to be revolving around the sole subject of love. Every song I liked seemed to be about love. My friends were busy falling in love with some other people, my dad was in love with me and his work, my mom said she loved me, I loved my sister, and my small neighbour kid loved his bicycle, while that little child I knew down the street loved only his chocolate (or so I thought!). So up until a good number of years, love seemed to be those rose tinted glasses which were meant to make everything happy.
And then one day, I read the papers wide eyed, to see that just because this man in the news loved this woman, who wouldn’t agree on marrying him, he killed her! That day, love gave itself one more meaning in my head. Something very contrary to what it had been so far. I thought about it for several days, and finally decided that this too involved the happy love I’d known so far, only ending bad. I felt better.
Each day after that day, I tried to look for love in lives. I was surprised the way I’d missed these nuances so far! How could I have not seen that love in that my maid showed to me when she cleaned my table everyday? It never crossed my mind to thank my mother for the love she showed to me each day, by cooking the most amazing food, and making sure I ate healthy. It surprised me when I realized that I’d never made an attempt to appreciate all the love my father gave me every day all day, by doing what was best for me, and making me do the best too. My sister – how could I not acknowledge her love in pampering me even though she is the younger one? Wasn’t it love when my friends laughed at even my not-so-funny jokes?
Today life patiently still goes on to teach me what love is. Almost every day I see love in newer forms. Surprisingly, I don’t realize it’s love when I see it, but thankfully, I understand it if not then, a little later. And it makes me smile, each time I understand it. Now what amuses me, is that if this emotion is so pretty, why do some people deny its existence? So much so, that they will frown when told that they are loved? Or that they should love?
There isn’t enough love in this world, they say. And yet, embracing love can bring you the happiest feeling ever. To love isn’t easy, but it is definitely easier than to hate! Here, I come to the most important part of my post today- expressing love! When you know that love is magic, and that it makes things easy, why not express it? Most people I know, hesitate in expressing their love, even though I’m pretty certain that they intend to love. I wonder why it’s so difficult for some. Your manner of expression could vary, your style could be one never used before, but expressing love nonetheless makes sense. Anything from a simple smile, to a tight hug is a brilliant expression of love. For some, exchanging silence could be an expression of love, while for others, blabbering all the time could mean love. A friend i know, simply drops in little ‘I love you’ notes to his people when he feels love for them. Why wait for a perfect moment to express it? Go all out. Express your love where you feel it. Paint the world in tinted colours, for expressing love is probably the simplest way of showing it, and also probably the easiest way of minimizing hatred.
Love isn’t easy, but it’s definitely worth the effort.
Love. And how I see it.
P.s. I have been working on this post for the longest time, and as surprising this is to me myself, this was not one of the easy posts that I have published here. A thousand thoughts run in my mind as I write here today, and a million people and their way of expressing love crosses my mind. I’m unable to augment all, but I really hope this is a beginning of understanding this complex emotion, and lays a foundation stone to start a discussion here on this beauty.
As a kid, I used to be really happy about every television show that had any element of ‘magic’ in it! I used to love the way anything could be made to appear out of nowhere, and then be made to disappear to somewhere just on a wave of hand, or a wand, or by blinking eyes or by a swirl of a body part, or something else so nice. Each time, at the end of the show, I would thank my stars for being able to see that episode which made sweets appear from nowhere, and transformed animals into people, and distasteful food items to sweets and chocolates, letting me into a whole new arena of wild imagination. And while all of this continued to happen on the TV, whether owing to some magic sand, or a genie, or a robot doll, or simply some witches from centuries ago ( yes, I can imagine you all recalling which television series I am referring to J), thanks to my ma, I also read many many books featuring elves, and gnomes, and magic lands, and faraway magic trees, and the little people there, once again, taking my imagination and fascination about magic to newer levels.
I would keep my broken tooth under the pillow, greedily waiting for the ‘tooth fairy’ to give me presents ( I know you all did too!). I would be nice to my friends so that some fairy godmother would grant me my wishes. I would now and then, peek into the backyard to see if the brooms were doing a secret dance. I would try not to lie, lest my nose grow longer than Pinocchio. I would always be on a look out for trees growing boiled candies, and fountains with flowing chocolate syrup. I would look for secret tunnels in my garden, and for little wooden doors on the trees around. I had a picture of each of those fairy characters in my mind- how they looked, what they ate, how their magic affected all, and how their houses were. And then there was an era of serious books and shows, which temporarily paused all the magic.
Growing up, there came the famous Harry Potter with his band of magicians, potions, schools that taught magic, witches, wizards, degrees in magic, so and so forth. Once again, being an enthusiast of magic and its wonders, I read each book wide eyed until I would finish it, and kept hoping secretly, that maybe a Hagrid would one day visit me too, and tell me that I could do magic! Of course, that didn’t happen, and here I am telling you about it!
Some years on, and now today, the word ‘magic’ still charms me, and now no longer in the fairy tale manner. It sends me a little tickle each time I think of it. It makes me smile in a way that I almost blush. So what is magic? To me, magic as I understand it today, is something that makes things happen- whether by a supernatural powerful way, or by a scientific action and reaction way, or simply because as they say, ‘it was meant to happen’. They meet because of magic, they click because of magic, they fight due to the absence of magic, they share a magic moment because of magic, and there is magic because of magic. My question now is, if there’s so much to magic, and if magic brings so many smiles, why not accept its existence and significance in our lives, and weave it into our life routines, and spread some magic around?
Didn’t you feel the magic when your dad let go of your bicycle the first time, and you managed to ride it without falling and without losing your balance for a full thirty seconds? Wasn’t it magical when you realized that you actually managed to cook a decent dish on your own for the first time? Haven’t we all seen magic happen on festivals when the whole family is around, and all faces have smiles? “Oh, I too can sing!” “Ah, my feet dance too!” The smell of freshly brewed coffee. The aroma of fresh spices. Her smile. His nod. Friends. Kindness. Friendship. Love. Hope. Countless reasons, all for that magic!
All I’d say, with so much more to say, is that, magic is where you look for it, and if magic gives you hope and strength, why not sprinkle some in every walk, and experience magic (sic.). Look for magic, and let yourself smile every time you feel it. Let it grow, and sometimes create it too. For just like joy, magic too can be beautiful and soulful.
So, MAGIC IS AN EXPRESSION TOO. You could find it wherever you look for it. And it can be whatever you want it to be. ENJOY YOUR MAGIC! *twinggg*
Psst.. I experience magic in relationships, love, laughter and even tears. Its truly magical :)
I’d long back heard a story that ended in a conclusion that when left alone in a cell, the punishment to a prisoner is the gravest for the absence of company (and conversation?) – ‘solitary confinement’. Ever since humankind developed the art of conversation, it has seen only progress, and advancement. It isn’t even any rocket science to understand what exactly ‘conversation’ is. Simply put, a conversation is an exchange of thoughts, whether in a language, or by the use of expressions simply. The main purpose is social interaction, and being able to put across a point, inviting opinion too.
Some say, conversation is an art. I say, everyone is an artist if that is taken to be true! In my limited experience of life, I understand that everyone around me has established their own form and format of conversing with their loved ones. I see an environmentalist conversing with the nature. I see mother of a new born conversing with her bundle of joy. I see two friends chatting away to glory every time they meet. I see that dog owner, play with his dog everyday and have his own fun conversing. And then I see some people conversing by being silent, hence proving that conversation doesn’t really have to have a script, or a standard format or involve wagging tongues. One can just pick one’s own mode of communication, align it with the others, and converse in the most beautiful forms.
I call that long chat I have with my friend, a conversation. And then I call the long periods of no talk, conversation too. I see beauty in being able to converse without words. There can’t be, and shouldn’t be a straight- jacket formula for how a conversation should be. One should simply just pick one’s format, mean, and mode of conversing. In fact, it would always be much more fun and comfortable if one chose one’s own different mode of conversing with every other entity. So while X would love to chatter away when talking to Y, X could also choose to converse through silence when with Z, and to converse only through smiles while with me :)
THE IDEA THUS BEING, THAT MY WORDS DON’T DEFINE MY INTENT, AND WHAT MATTERS THE MOST IS THAT I’M ABLE TO SOCIALLY INTERACT, PUTTING ACROSS MY STATE OF MIND, AND READING THE OTHER PERSON’S MIND AS IS PUT FORTH TO ME TOO, MUCH TOO COMFORTABLY, MUCH TOO EFFORTLESSLY.
A conversation that made me smile today!
(P.s. Just as I was going to publish this post today, I received a postcard from a dear friend saying, ” Hey! I care for you :)“. I had started this conversation yesterday, and it left me smiling today. Once again, this leaves me forever amused and thankful to the small joys of love, conversation and expression!!)
There are times when you have been thinking of one too many things at once and then you decide to write to clear your head. This is one of those moments for me today, and hope by the end of this piece, I am more sorted, or at least I’ve floated an idea to the reader.
We come across so many people in our cris cross paths of life, that we tend to ignore some of these encounters, never realising that each brush is adding to the score, and the experience. Some people around you will always be found smiling no matter what, some will always be found whining no matter what, some will be sad all the time and others will have little or no reaction to situations. Nonetheless they are all a part of a journey. They too are trying to figure out their paths, their destinies as they are entwined with those around them, and in the whole process, their ifs and buts.
So, we all crave for peace and clarity. We all want to complete the jigsaw with the right pieces fitting together. And we all want that the headphones don’t knot within themselves (this one just randomly hit me!). But we don’t often realise how these pieces being fit together in different combinations lead to newer designs. We fail to appreciate the experiences of others, whether good or bad. We forget to be happy for the celebrations, and try only to concentrate on the pits. We even forget to concentrate on making our own lives beautiful, and go around attempting to unravel the lives of those around.
Not as a solution to all these situations, but more as a way of how I look at these things, I suggest take we out only five minutes everyday, at the end of each day, to think about what we did and encountered that day. We think about how those things in that day affected our life, or will they make any difference at all. At some level, they will. It is for us to reflect on those bits and if required, even work on them. For example, think of that smile that made you smile today. Cherish that twinkle you saw in your crush’s eyes today. Shed a tear for the injustice you thought was happening. Smirk for a second on that neighbour you don’t like. Briefly smile for that secret couple. Think of the friend you missed for even a minute today. Reflect on the ways you wanted things to happen. Cringe on the sudden pain you felt. Feel the hug of a loved one you wished was around. The list could go on and on, and yet not be exhaustive. Go all out and express to at least yourself, if not to the world. Only because, it’s healthy, and it acts an an easy guide to ‘how it should be’. I think what I want to say here is that let expressions play a role in your life. Let the smile be the pushing force, and not the reason to smile. LET YOUR EXPERIENCE TEACH YOU AN EXPRESSION EACH TIME.